Thursday 12 March 2009

Cute, but Evil Part 1: The Zumi Fetish Doll AKA " He Who Kills "


" This is He Who Kills, He is a Deadly Hunter. "


Honest.




Name : " He Who Kills "

Occupation : Zumi Fetish Doll.

Age : Stamped on feet or on back of box.

Weight : Err... about half a kilogram... probably.

Height : 1"4

Appearance : Scary but kind of cute. Word of warning - do not describe as ugly or say things like - " even your mother wouldn't love you. "

Previous Owners : Richard Matheson, Dan Curtis, Karen Black.

Favourite Weapons : A spear or anything really sharp.
Likes (other than his spear) : Household cutlery, particularly carving knives. Stabbing people in the face, arms or legs. Biting people on the neck. Proving that door handles fail as sufficient obstacles to death. People trying to drown him (no lungs). Howling or screaming " Die!! Die!! Die!! ". Being fucking terrifying.

Dislikes : People. Being shut in suitcases. Comparisons to smurfs or muppets. Ovens.

Location : Can be found here.

Anything Else : Not suitable for anyone under the age of 200.

1 comment:

  1. Richard Matheson's "The Prey" ... Very good post ......

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts with Thumbnails